SAUGATUCK, Mich. — The photos inside Jim Sullivan's scrapbook are fading around the edges. Not unlike his friendship with his college roommate.
"We saw each other in travels... got together a couple times for football games and things like that," shrugged Jim.
Erin Dwyer and Jim met during a debate at the University of Notre Dame 50 years ago. Erin argued Jim was wrong about a point he made, citing a book. Jim later read the book and found out Erin made the whole thing up. Erin still won the debate.
"I got to know his crafty side and his intelligence at the same time," laughed Jim.
They have aged a bit since then, Jim eventually moving to Saugatuck and Erin to Florida. But even now, in their late 60s, neither were ready for this.
“I learned that he was losing kidney function," explained Jim, “And was now in serious form of dialysis every other day."
“My daughter, somebody posted on Facebook 'any donors are welcome,'" said Erin over Zoom. “All my family and I have a pretty large family tested. They were all disqualified for various reasons.”
Fifty years later, Jim still acted as if no time had passed.
“Soon as I heard that he was in trouble. I said, 'What can I do to help?'” said Jim.
Just like all those years ago as his roommate, Jim was a match.
“I said, Yeah, I guess you'll always have a piece of me with you," laughed Jim. "I guess we are truly blood brothers."
But that was before Jim knew what was coming next.
“He was a swimmer for Hope and kept in shape by swimming,” explained Jim.
Jim’s son, Danny, was out for a swim one morning while in Vietnam.
“He died suddenly.. ironically, in a pool, he apparently did not have a heart attack did not drown. His heart just stopped," he said.
When he got the call across the world, Jim’s heart did, too. His son was 27 when he died.
“We finally got a FaceTime into the ICU unit where Danny was and it was quite clear he was he was gone," said Jim, "Said some prayers and said goodbye and turned the machines off all within 20 minutes.”
Twenty minutes, that put everything on hold.
“I actually kind of thought that would probably be the end of it. You know, he obviously had a much bigger issue than worrying about me," said Erin.
But Jim decided to turn his loss into a lifesaving gain.
“My son wouldn't want his death to have created a problem for someone else and lead to someone else's death," said Jim.
He gave his kidney to his college roommate — turned lifelong friend.
“Kind of as a group, they decided this would be, you know, something that I think kind of honors his son," said Erin.
It’s an honor Erin doesn’t quite know how to live up to.
“There is no good way to say thank you," Erin said.
And a privilege Jim doesn’t want to be thanked for.
“You're both in the water, the boat's sunk. You've got two life preservers. And your friend needs one, what do you do? And it was as easy as that," he smiled.
Erin gets more time with his wife and kids. And Jim gets his friend back.
"I got the better end of the deal. I truly did," smiled Jim.
To learn more about donating the gift of life, go to Donate Life America here. Jim says the surgery was easy, and he was back to life as usual within three weeks.
You can also donate to the Daniel Sullivan memorial scholarship at Hope College here.
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